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The way children develop aggressive behavior is not too surprising. We often react aggressively towards aggressive behavior which is sending mixed signals at best. It is natural and unconsciously done. We need to condition ourselves as parents to suspend preconceptions when confronted with undesirable, unwanted behavior.

Aggressive behavior can develop in children early on and can be adapted from some of the most unlikely places. An interesting point to mention is when the good wife goes along with whatever the husband thinks is best in order to avoid conflict. Although the intention is good the outcome usually backfires.This kind of environmental tension become the soil for developing this type of negative behavior and allowing it to grow. This creates an unreal expectation of reality and eventually natural expression will bring conflict as well as tension.

Expressing yourself feels good. It feels good and feels right, and much of the time it is right. Yet there are limits to this expression and reasonable ones at that. Once a persons expression surfaces, whether angry or otherwise when it directly affects or is a danger to others; then it becomes a problem.

The attitudes we adapt to and the characteristics we possess are usually a product of environment. Aggressive behavior often indicates limiting beliefs and usually represents a lack of alternatives. It can sometimes be an unconscious habit of parents to act more like an angry boss who is irritated with telling everyone what to do all the time; rather than being attentive in a caring fashion. This all creates a kind of tension in the environment.

This is very difficult to change and will take some time. So try not to be too hard on yourself or give up too soon. The change is worth it.

Its completely natural to get a little excited when you see children hitting each other or acting out. Things like “They should know better!” are natural transgressions when disciplining an aggressive child. But it is exactly what teaches children the “My way or the highway” attitude.

Try your best to avoid this and the best way in my opinion is never to abruptly “Take control” of a bad situation. Always take a step back first. It is also good policy to involve the child in deciding consequences. Make sure that whenever discipline is in order that the child has a say and their voice is clearly heard. They will learn by example to express themselves in a civil manner gets more accomplished than the aggressive alternative.

To Discover the Causes of Aggression Ask Yourself These Questions:

The more included your child is on the part of making decisions regarding limits, restrictions and boundaries; the better your child can emotionally process the disappointment and search for alternatives. They will also be much more inclined to follow the guidelines which they themselves helped to determine. Not to mention being readily prepared to take responsibility for their actions.

Just as previously mentioned, it has a lot to do with the social environment of the household. Attitude is contagious. Aggressive behavior is often enough like a contagious snowball. It builds in momentum. So you have to watch out for how and when your behavior affects others. Just do your very best each and every day. Take one day at a time and keep at it with a positive and Forgiving attitude both of yourself and of your child or children.